Reviews. Ratings. Stories. The "Dick in the Popcorn" trick.

If it's about a movie...or going to a movie...or, Christ, even watching TV...you'll find it here in "Moog's Movie Reviews!"

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Wall-E and the Biggest Loser


It’s time once again for Moog’s Movie Reviews!!

Where the movie ratings I see end up sounding like a rabid dog:

"G-R-R-R-G-G-R-R-R-R"


Just sayin'.

This weekend, I had the pleasure of seeing:

Wall-E


I was really looking forward to this movie, and it didn't disappoint.

My wife, however, was a little disappointed because she expected a LOT out of this movie, and feels that it was either over-hyped, or she had just built it up a lot in her mind.

Again...this is exactly why I didn't take her to see Iron Man.

If she didn't like it, I would have no choice but to lock her in the basement for weeks.

Again.


Okay...back to Wall-E:

The movie starts out very slowly - with very little for kids to latch onto.

As such, I actually think my kids were a little bored with the beginning of the movie (about the first 20 minutes or so)...

...as there is absolutely NO dialog for at least the first 1/2 hour.

If your kids have a short attention span, Wall-E might not be for you.

Actually - if you're the jackass sitting behind me with his two year old who wouldn't shut the f*ck up - NO MOVIES are for your daughter. NONE.

Wait for the f*cking DVD, asshole. Thanks in advance.


Wall-E goes from an environmental message to a message about health and exercise, all the while being a love story.

When there finally IS dialog, it's spoken by a cast of character humans who all look like people auditioning for the reality show, "The Biggest Loser."

All the robots do EVERYTHING for EVERYONE and - as such - all the humans get enormously fat.

If you're offended by fat jokes (or fat people), then there's a lot of it here...none of which, thankfully, belongs to Oprah.


In the end, I liked the movie a lot and thought it was cute. I think my kids like "Kung Fu Panda" more, actually...

...but this is MY review and they can fight me on it when they learn to type.

Hopefully, the robots won't be doing it for them.


My Score:

3 Mooge Splats (out of a possible four)



Moog out.

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Haven't had enough?

Come swing by and see me at my other blog, Mental Poo.
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2 comments:

AngryMan said...

I'm trying to talk Wifey into seeing this movie, but she won't go to a kids movie until we actually have a kid.
Lame.
I can't go by myself, though, b/c I don't want to look like a child molester.

meleah rebeccah said...

No one does a movie review like you. My god man, you are hilarious.