Reviews. Ratings. Stories. The "Dick in the Popcorn" trick.

If it's about a movie...or going to a movie...or, Christ, even watching TV...you'll find it here in "Moog's Movie Reviews!"

Monday, July 7, 2008

Vagina Dentata


It’s time once again for Moog’s Movie Reviews!!

Where I watch shit, just for you.

Just like the towel guy in the men's room.

LOOK AT MY SHIT, PEASANT!!

Sorry.

Today, I'm reviewing another masterpiece off my Netflix list:

Teeth


This will be one of my shortest reviews, ever.

If you enjoy shitty horror movies about girls with fangs in their vagina...

...sexual assaults...

...multiple castration scenes showing severed, bloody penises...

...and the kid from "Nip/Tuck" (Hey! Look! It's Matt!)...

...well, then:

This one's for you.


Me?

Not so much.

What made this worse is that I heard it was good.

I'm not sure WHO I heard this from...but if I ever figure it out, I may actually kill them.

With my toothed-vagina.

Ugh.

Iggy.

My Score:

1/2 Mooge Splat (out of a possible four)



Now...please excuse me while I hide in the bathtub while protectively cupping my balls.

Moog out.

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Haven't had enough?

Come swing by and see me at my other blog, Mental Poo.
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4 comments:

AngryMan said...

I think that this movie touched you in a way you're unwilling to admit.

C.Rag said...

They made a movie about Rosie O'Donnell's vag? WTF? Is Michael Jackson's white snake next?

LBluca77 said...

Ok I am adding this one to my netflix. Have to see just how bad it is.

meleah rebeccah said...

Y-I-K-E-S.